All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
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