i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Randomize
