Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize
