It's just like the Real World with babies
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Randomize
