Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
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