Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Randomize
