don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
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