we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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