Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Randomize
