At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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