I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
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