WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Randomize