It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Found your dick twin last night
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Randomize
