Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
