we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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