yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Randomize
