my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Randomize
