I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Randomize
