Your tits are I can't wait for
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Randomize
