she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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