dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
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