Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
you win again, gameday.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Randomize
