belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Dating After Heartbreak
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
These Images Prove Chrissy Teigen is the Funniest Model Alive
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for