Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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