you guys were way drunker than both of me
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
