dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
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Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
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Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
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