yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Randomize
