thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize
