Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
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