Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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