That's intense
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Randomize
