Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize
