ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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