Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Randomize
