Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
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