marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
Randomize
