we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Randomize