I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
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