we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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