he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
this is an emotional support booty call
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
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