The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize