but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize