**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
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