I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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