So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Randomize
