her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Randomize
