Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
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