Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
