watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
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