is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
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