i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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