check it out our google latitudes are spooning
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
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